At the time I saw this poster on Facebook I commented, ‘It’s not a problem.’ Now, when preparing to my next workshop at our next Chiltern Escapes day on 24 April, I’d like to add a bit more, ‘The problem is not what other people think of us, the problem is what we think other people think of us because mostly they don’t even think of us!’
It is our inner critic filling in the gaps of missing information and we believe it. At our our workshop we will examine our inner critic and the ways to deal with it. It happens so that women’s inner critic is much stronger and more negative than that of men. And it causes serious grievance for many at their work place as women often underachieve and shy away from promotions and opportunities as well as are more sensetive to office politics.
It is so for many reasons. But one of the basic ones lays in the difference between feminine and masculine energies. Masculine energy minimizes and dismisses problems and criticism in order for its carrier to survive, move on and lead. Feminine energy magnifies and exaggerates problems, because it’s more sensitive to other people’s feelings in order for everybody else (babies, young children, old and fragile people) to survive and thrive around the carriers of feminine energy. I have to add here that both adult men and women could be in each energy depending on situation and their own state, so when you read masculine it doesn’t mean all men only, the same is true about feminine and women, that’s why I used ‘carrier of the energy’ instead. Knowing this we all can adopt flexibility at work and home in order to lead more productive, happier and fulfilled lives.
Back to dealing with our inner critic. While we cannot get rid of it completely we can harness it. There are a lot of exercises for our Friday group of women to see the ways their inner critic is not helping them at work or home, when that mostly negative and nagging voice is exposed many women experience great changes for themselves in work environment and intimate relationships. Also the process helps to distinguish inner critic from the voice of inner wisdom which speaks with warmth, compassion and positive perspective. I’m looking forward to our workshop on Friday.